Friday, July 19, 2013

It's Always Sumthin', Stupidity Division

I was given a mouth-guard to wear at night at the conclusion of our latest Adventures In Modern Dentistry, i.e., when I got my two new bridges and the last of several implants, the purpose bein' to prevent damage to these very expensive modern dental appliances in the event I grind my teeth while sleeping.  Not that I've ever done THAT... at least not to my knowledge... but what do I know?  I'm asleep, after all.  So I dutifully wear the thing every night.

Until last night.

I don't even know how this is possible, but I managed to lose the mouth-guard.  This event completely baffles me, as I always take the damned thing out in either one of two places: my bathroom (if I spend a "normal" night in my spiffy bed) or at the kitchen sink, if I spend the night on my spiffy couch.  I rinse the appliance and let it air dry on the sink and the only exception to this ritual is the prescribed once-a-week soak in Efferdent.  No other exceptions, none.

Yet I lost it.  It's gone.

I'm actually beginning to think someone snuck in the house and stole it coz I just could NOT be this damned stoopid.

So now I'm gonna have to pay for a replacement mouth-guard.  It's always SUMTHIN'.

Update, 1600 hrs.  Nevermind.  Found, in the door of my fridge.  I keep a baggie o' pre-cut lime wedges in my fridge and apparently the mouth-guard got stuck to that baggie at some point yesterday.  Yeah, I KNOW... it MIGHT be time to change out that baggie. 

But we ARE relieved.


  1. Check laundry. Shirt pockets... Also, check under the agitator in the washing machine. Use a coat hanger.

  2. You need to create a Pennington coat of arms.

    With this motto: Semper est aliquid.

    Just sayin'...

  3. Replies
    1. Roseanne Rosannadanna made it all one word. In my world.

  4. Toby often takes his out in the middle of the night and does not even know he did it. Usually he manages to set them on the nightstand, but sometimes they are just in the bed with us.

    1. I've never done that, Lou. Then again, I never grind my teeth, either.

  5. I have this image of you now, passed out with a lip lock and swinging on the refrigerator door. Thanks for that!
    Have you considered sewing it to you ear with a nice long piece of thread?



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