My Buddy Ed In Florida sends along the following:
THE ADULT LEARNING CENTRE
REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
By August 30, 2013
NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL
OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM.
Class 1
Up in Winter, Down in Summer - How to Adjust a Thermostat
Step by Step, with Slide Presentation.
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hrs beginning at 7:00 PM.
Class 2
Which Takes More Energy - Putting the Toilet Seat Down, or Bitching About It for 3 Hours?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours.
Class 3
Is It Possible To Drive Past a Wal-Mart Without Stopping?--Group Debate.
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 4
Fundamental Differences Between a Purse and a Suitcase-- Pictures and Explanatory Graphics.
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks.
Class 5
Curling Irons--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Bathroom Cabinet?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning
At 7:00 PM.
Class 6
How to Ask Questions During Commercials and Be Quiet During the Program.
Help Line Support and Support Groups.
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM.
Class 7
Can a Bath Be Taken Without 14 Different Kinds of Soaps and Shampoos?
Open Forum.
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours.
Class 8
Health Watch--They Make Medicine for PMS - USE IT!
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours.
Class 9
I Was Wrong and He Was Right!--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined.
Class 10
How to Parallel Park In Less Than 20 Minutes Without an Insurance Claim.
Driving Simulations.
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours.Class 11Learning to Live--How to Apply Brakes Without Throwing Passengers Through the Windshield.
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined.
Class 12
How to Shop by Yourself.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM.
The author is in the Witness Protection Program and cannot be contacted. Be careful.
Heh.
In other news... it appears the NHL lockout is over and we'll have an abbreviated hockey season this year. It's way too early in the morning, I'm not fully caffeinated yet, and I don't have an opinion on the subject... except to say I'M STILL PISSED OFF!
"... it appears the NHL lockout is over..."
ReplyDeleteand I was just beginning to sorta enjoy the NBA
You're a better man... or at least a more diverse man... than I, Ivan.
DeleteI actually need class 1. I have no problems with the others. Well, maybe the curling iron thang. But it is too hot to put it up, and then I forget. At least I can rinse my cup AND put it in the dishwasher rather than leaving it on the counter. There is never any discussion about leaving the toilet lid up or down. But if I fall in the toilet bowl in the middle of the night and get my butt wet, there will be a flying objects.
ReplyDeleteHeh on Items #1 and #2. It's funny, but I don't remember any discussion about toilet seats in my Happy Home, either.
DeleteThe note in red at the bottom says it all. :-)
ReplyDeleteI saw the note about he NHL lockout last night and figured you'd have a take on it. I'm thinking "what a total waste, practically a whole season gone; more fans alienated." But, I defer to you in all matters relating to hockey, so I'll be coming back later today to see what you say.
I may not have anything else on the lockout, Dan. While it's true that I'm still angry I'm also one of those die-hard fans... so I'll sign up for the Center Ice package and be right back in the fold when the season begins. It's kinda like battered-wife syndrome: "But I LOVE him!"
Delete