Tuesday, October 23, 2012

There and Back

So... we got off to Lubbock on schedule and arrived at the urologist's office an hour and a half before the appointed time, which is our habit.  To wit: if you're early, you're on time; if you're on time, you're late; if you're late, you're F*CKED.  That's an ol' Air Force... and prolly all the other services, too... axiom that's served me well throughout life.  I was fortunate in that the Good Doctor saw me much earlier than my scheduled appointment and we were done and back on the road to P-Ville before our scheduled appointment time.  We were happy about that, but not so pleased with the visit.

Long story short: the urologist and his tech took more blood for to run another PSA test.  If the results come back the same as last time we have to undergo this great good time.  From The Wiki:
The procedure may be performed transrectally, through the urethra or through the perineum. The most common procedure is transrectal, and may be done with tactile finger guidance,[2] or, more commonly and precisely, with ultrasound guidance.[3]

About a dozen samples are taken from the prostate gland through a thin needle - about six from each side. If the procedure is performed transrectally, antibiotics are prescribed to prevent infection. An enema may also be prescribed for the morning of the procedure. In both the transrectal and the transperineal procedure, the doctor inserts an ultrasound probe into the rectum to help guide the biopsy needles. A local anesthetic is then administered into the tissue around the prostate, similar to the local anesthetic administered for a dental procedure. A spring-loaded prostate tissue collection needle is then inserted into the prostate, through the rectum (or more rarely through the perineum), about a dozen times. It makes a clicking sound, and there may be considerable discomfort.[3]
Aiiieee... "considerable discomfort?" There's this, from that third footnote, above:
“OK, Mr. Stuckey,” he says, “you’re going to feel another little pinch.” Doubting that I can tense any more, I manage to. “Schtick!” The spring-loaded needle makes an odd little clicking sound. Oh. My. God. I am being sodomized with a knitting needle. Eleven more times? Hah! I manage to avoid screaming, probably only because I am busy trying to find the words to tell the doctor and nurse that I obviously can’t handle the rest of the procedure without large doses of morphine and Valium.
OMG, to the tenth power.  What HAVE we gotten our self into?  I think Happy Hour might be SLIGHTLY longer than usual today.

There's that and then there's this:  EIP has a very high probability of becoming sumthin' of a major downer; all we can do right now is wait and hope.  And drink.

25 comments:

  1. Your mileage may vary... As for me? No. Like Jake and Elwood, we have a deal with the Lord. The Lord has pulled my bacon out of a few genuine fires and I am grateful and have faith. Doctors and Hospitals are responsible for more than 200,000 deaths each year.

    http://www.naturodoc.com/library/public_health/doctors_cause_death.htm

    From what I read about this affliction, sometimes age and other factors will get you before the prostate will. I figure if it will keep until I'm 85 then I ain't rocking the boat. YMMV.

    But I hope you get what ever treatment(s) you need and are successful in beating down whatever ails you.

    The Medical Profession scares me.

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    1. Yeah, my mileage does vary but thanks for the input, Daryl. I respect the medical profession a lot, despite all of the documented horror stories.

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  2. Oh Buck...I don't know what to say except that you will be in my prayers.

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  3. Buck, is that your very own personal tush photo augmenting that procedure description? If so, I now possibly regret being so formal and dignified during your brief visits. I am a bit of a closeted arse gal, you know.







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    1. Have no regrets, Lin... that's not me; it's a generic pic I found in a Google search. You DID provide a heretofore unknown insight, though. ;-)

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  4. Funny from the small world category. I just had that procedure done. My PSA was at 25. Yes, your read that right. My general who does blood work on my every 3-months (because of my diabetes) called the house at 9:00pm after he received the results. And it was him on the phone not an assistant or clerk. Wife took the call as I was out with the neighbor walking the dogs. She was spooked. But all 11 of the samples they took came back normal. The last PSA was in the "Elevated" range at a mere 7. I get another blood draw when I am home next in November. We will see how it is then. As for the procedure, was far less painful than I thought it was going to be but you have be comfortable with your bare ass being on display and played with!!

    BT: Jimmy T sends (from CZ).

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    1. Interesting, Jimmy... and thank you, especially for your comments on the biopsy procedure. My PSA is in the elevated range now, too... exactly where yours is: seven. The reading I've done on the subject (if memory serves) says that a quarter of men with a PSA in the elevated range have or get prostate cancer. Those aren't very reassuring statistics. I discussed this with the urologist today and he maintains I "should" be a four or less; I get the feeling he's very conservative.

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    2. I think Doctors tend to be conservative because the litigators get to use Monday Morning Quarterbacking tactics. "Oh, you didn't do this...?"

      Still, I think the human body is pretty resilient.

      The Spousal Unit and myself had a discussion on this subject, last night. I stand by what I said, but it applies to me. She has more faith in the medical industry, too.

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    3. I think Doctors tend to be conservative because the litigators...

      I think you're absolutely right. I have faith and trust in our doctors, but I certainly don't want to be anyone's guinea pig.

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  5. First, let me say I'm glad that didn't turn out to be a photo of you. I like you and all, but...

    Hey, no joking, I'm saying a prayer for you. Drink up, relax, and let's hope for the best.

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  6. I could've gone all day without that photo. Just sayin'. . .

    I've made my share of colonoscopy and 'prostate exam' jokes in my day (if I was ever 'bi-curious', I'm not anymore. . .) But that is definitely taking it to the next level. Ouch!

    Saying a prayer on your behalf. . .

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    1. I gotta admit that photo gave me the creeps when I saw it the first time, and I KNEW what I was looking for. ;-) Thanks for your kind thoughts, Craig.

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  7. Cheer up, Buck, just think, another excuse to drink! (as if hedonistic you needed another one :) ) Srsly, my wife the RN says those things have a way of varying wildly over time, so even elevated levels aren't necessarily cause for panic unless continued over time. OTOH Docs don't want to wait too long and let it get out of hand, hence the bio to confirm yea or nay..

    BTW, iirc the latest "trend"/approach is NOT to jump to surgery as they are finding other ways to cope if cancerous as surgery brings its own potential major problems...wife says their are also special cobalt-type rods that they often insert temp to slow/kill the stuff...but lets NOT get ahead of ourselves and go there yet..

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    1. Yeah, "let's not get ahead of ourselves" is RIGHT! One thinks about possible scenarios in a situation like this and I've thought a LOT about the "other problems" associated with surgery. I sure as Hell don't wanna go there. Thanks for asking yer wife about this, Virg... much appreciated.

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  8. "...there are..." viz "their are"

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  9. We're thinking about you here, too, Buck.

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  10. Look like I'm a little late to yer party

    I'm prayin', too

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  11. Buck, this procedure sounds absolutely awful. You're in our thoughts and prayers.

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  12. I saw an episode on Dr. Oz about people who tweet or post on the internet more than some people are comfortable with. Some of the stories people posted were funny, but embarrassing to someone. You might want to contact Dr. Oz with your story. Not only could he talk to you about your health, he could talk to you about posting TMI.

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Just be polite... that's all I ask.