If a lifetime can be likened to a day, then this is Happy Hour!
Racist? Why? Is that a watermelon daiquiri he's drinking?
A watermelon daiquiri would be Teh Ghey. Oops.
Gay-cist. It's a two-fer.
Now we need to figger out a way to offend wimmen, too. In the spirit of covering ALL the bases, of course.
Well, leaving them out like we did is usually a pretty sure bet for pissing 'em off. I'm calling this mission a success.
So I'm not Oriental ...how racist is that?
So I guess you meant a different orient
Ah. I geddit now. I'm pretty thick, at times.
Jus' call 'em Babe.
Either one works... in MY experience. ;-)
I was actually in my mid-twenties before I heard that raaaaaaaaaaaaaacist phrase. Pam and I were in the French Quarter (actually in Jackson Square), having charcoal drawings done by some guy named Joe (I think it was 10 bucks per). I can't remember his last name, but his first name was Joe (okay...it was Wilson). He had a son he'd named "Apple." Really.Apple. Really.He was as funny as hell, and while doing his work, he let that one slip...told about that night that an old hippie hooked up with blackness, etc.I've thought about that many times since. I guess I'll have to trust ol' Joe on that one...
I've thought about that many times since. About old hippies hooking up with blackness? I MIGHT could tell a story in that space. But I WON'T.
You can call me "Babe" but you better not call me "toots."
Don't EVER call me "too late for supper."
HA! Good one, "Toots"...
Back at ya, Honey Love!
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Personally, I would have preferred, "How'd you like this torch up yer ass?", but I suppose that would have made it less publishable.
That would depend on where you want to publish it.
Heh. What Ivan said.
Buck - I like your final suggested version much better. And I do like the "...commie switch to Romney" bit. Good humor.And I don't mind babe. Just don't call me honey or sweetie.
Uh-oh. I use "sweetie" a lot, and sometimes I'm not even bein' sarcastic.
"Sweetie" is for old ladies. I'm with Kris on this one.
That could be a regional thing for me Buck; men here in the liberal wasteland don't use sweetie as any sort of endearment, unless they are married to the woman.
Okay, here's the deal. Down South you'll rarely hear a man use the terms "Sweetie," "Hon," and honestly, NEVER "Toots."The gals on the other hand..."Sweetie," "Hon," and "Sugar," are commonly used by the gals (regardless of the gender of the person they are addressing). Now, older gentlemen (such as myself) will use "Sugar" when speaking to a lady...but usually just to a young lady that is either a daughter, or views you as a father figure. It's impolite to address someone near your age, or older that way...unless it is your wife/girlfriend/mistress/whatever.Glad I could clear that up.
OK... that's Down South, the last bastion of real manners and stuff like that. Or so I'm told. But us western dudes use "Sweetie" in casual conversation with female types that we know fairly well, not with strangers. Speakin' for Present Company, of course.
Yeah, in grade school we took "manners learnin'." And, EXTREMELY OLD LADIES gave us the skoolin'.God, I love, and miss those old ladies. They learnt me to be the man I'm iz!
Just be polite... that's all I ask.