Thursday, August 20, 2009

I'm In Deep Kimchee

A friend sends this along...
JUST IN ...
Democrats, realizing the success of the President's "Cash For Clunkers" rebate program, have revamped a major portion of their National Health Care Plan.
President Obama, Speaker Pelosi, and Sen. Reid are expected to make this major announcement at a joint news conference later this week. I have obtained an advanced copy of the proposal which is named....
"CASH FOR CODGERS" and it works like this... Couples wishing to access health care funds in order to pay for the delivery of a child will be required to turn in one old person. The amount the government allocates will be fixed according to a sliding scale. Older and more prescription dependent codgers will garner the highest amounts.
Special "Bonuses" will be paid for those submitting codgers in targeted groups, such as smokers, alcohol drinkers, persons 10 pounds over their government prescribed weight, and any member of the Republican Party.
Smaller bonuses will be given for codgers who consume beef, soda, fried foods, potato chips, lattes, whole milk, dairy products, bacon, Brussel sprouts, or Girl Scout Cookies.
All codgers will be rendered totally useless via toxic injection. This will insure that they are not secretly resold or their body parts harvested to keep other codgers in repair.
My highlighted emphasis added... if only to demonstrate the title of this post. Or: we be almost completely screwed. Why does this NOT surprise me? Altogether now: Heh!

―:☺:―

Apropos of the post below... we're just in from an abbreviated Happy Hour, which we held on the shady-side of El Casa Móvil De Pennington. I don't often sit on the shady-side as it's in close proximity to my neighbor and I don't want to intrude on his privacy. But sometimes extreme conditions call for extreme measures... which is to say we really wanted (needed?) a beer and a cigar. Today's Happy Hour was quite pleasant, actually. It's almost cool outside at the moment and the (ahem) breeze was quite nice. To a point, of course.

7 comments:

  1. I received that email a few days ago and forwarded it on to a few folks, many of whom are on the south side of 40. I appended this caveat -- "Beware, Whippersnappers: the Codgers are usually armed!"

    ReplyDelete
  2. virgil xenophon20 August, 2009 18:40

    PS to fellow New Orleanian Moogie P: add: "and peevish" to your description--no strike that--make that "HIGHLY peevish"

    ReplyDelete
  3. virgil xenophon20 August, 2009 18:50

    Buck/

    Speaking of "Deep Kimchee" when I was an I-Corps Quang Nam FAC I had a roomie who transferred up from II Corps who had been a ground FAC out in the field with the Korean "White Horse" Inf Div.
    He said: "Man, you haven't lived until you've smelled/eaten Kimchee that's been sittin' out fermenting in 110-115 degree heat all day! LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I guess it's good that your home can be moved rapidly. That way you can stay one step ahead of them ;)

    ReplyDelete
  5. ROFL - I hope no one here is a snitch - LOL!

    ReplyDelete
  6. So why discriminate against Brussels Sprouts?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Moogie and VX: I like your additions to the e-mail. :D

    VX: Kimchee is one of those "acquired tastes" I picked up along the way. And I can relate to your story, having been in The Ville outside Osan AB a few times... :D

    That said... getting good kimchee is nigh near impossible in these parts. The Cannon commissary has a reasonable facsimile (Thank God), but it's nothing like The Real Thing.. widely available in most major metro areas.

    BR: You have a great point about mobility! :D

    Cynthia: We're all friends here. I think. :D

    Kris sez: So why discriminate against Brussels Sprouts?

    Because they're ugly, bitter lil things that taste bad. Although my blog-bud Barry relayed a recipe for cooking them up with bacon that sounds pretty good, but I've yet to try it.

    ReplyDelete

Just be polite... that's all I ask.