Back On Our Head

The post title is a variation on the punchline from an old joke about the denizens of Hell and the proprietor of that space.  One could just as easily apply it to the 'toon above or to YrHmblScrb hisownself, who took a personal day yesterday.  I DO like the benefits, such as they are, with this job.  The pay sucks but there are perks... like working from home, surprise gifts from Occasional Readers that arrive in the mail or are sometimes delivered in person (Thanks Bob, Gordon, Jenny, Lou, and others too numerous to name!), and the boss is a REALLY great guy.  Well, most of the time.  He gets a lil testy from time to time and I think that's because he's in need of "a woman's touch," to be sorta delicate about the whole thing.

―:☺:―

Yesterday sucked.  We stayed up too late, slept too late, and the weather was miserable.  The sky alternated in between a steel gray overcast and towering dark cumulus clouds that threatened serious rain but only spit on us from time to time.  Said rain wasn't enough to wet the streets but it was just enough to keep us indoors.  It was also quite warm, humid, and windy... which is never a good combination, no matter where you are.

Our mood last evening was such that we passed up Happy Hour altogether; no beer, no G&Ts, no single malt, and no cigar.  I often use the phrase "I do that because I CAN" but yesterday was a case of not doing it to see if I could.  I suppose I'm not an alcohol junkie yet because I'm feeling no ill effects from a (close to) 48 hour bout of abstinence.

Things are much better today in all respects.  Our skies are clear and blue, the wind has died down (sorta), and the humidity is at a manageable level.  There WILL be a Happy Hour today.

―:☺:―

Finally... from our Taiwanese friends, what The One REALLY meant to say...

 

"Take a vacation.  Go somewhere nice.  Like Spain.  Wait."  Heh.

Broadening Our Horizons XXI

About a year and a half ago... in February, 2009... I put this up:

(Sigh)

This is why I sometimes wish I lived in Colorado... and one of the better things I've ever read about Valentines Day (apropos of nothing):

Dark Kriek

For many years we’ve celebrated Valentine’s Day at New Belgium Brewing by creating a special small batch beer for our family and friends. These beers tend to be a little funky, fruitful and straight from the heart. This year we decided to share the love.

New Belgium Brewing’s Dark Kriek is a limited edition Belgian kriek or cherry beer. Much darker than a traditional kriek with a dash of sour cherry up front, our Dark Kriek is actually a blend of two beers. We start with a light, dry, tannic beer aged two years in oak barrels and combine this with a heavier, dark ale and cherries to create one smooth cherry blast of love.  8% ABV

(ed note: "share the love" is rather limited... from a New Belgium Tweet: "lowdown on location for Dark Kriek (cases by state) CO 500, CA 500, WA 150, OR 150, IL 25 - and 25 cases to our Liquid Center")

But then again... Colorado has all that danged snow. Never mind. Priorities, yanno.

We no longer have to worry about all that danged snow as we enjoy a Lips of Faith.  Witness:

Lips of Faith, accompanied by an Acid Opulence 3

Apparently New Belgium has broadened their distribution channels this year; I picked up a couple of these 22-ouncers out at the Class VI Store earlier today.  A full verdict will be forthcoming but my initial impressions... after a couple o' sips... are good.  The cherry flavor is pronounced but in an oh-so-good sorta way.  This beer is more like a fine red wine than the run o' the mill brewery output.  And the deep dark red color is magnificent in the sunlight!

So it's back outside to continue as we've begun.

The Sunday Re-Run and an Update to Same

A couple o' years ago I posted the piece immediately below on the Dalley Windmill Collection, one of Portales' minor claims to fame.  I went searching for a suitable reference link to include in the re-post because the quoted link is dead.  In so doing I found out the Dalleys are trying to donate their collection to Roosevelt County.  From the Portales News-Tribune:

A Portales man wants to donate his life-long windmill collection to the county to be used as a tourist attraction, an idea the city turned down several years ago.

Bill Dalley brought the matter to the Roosevelt County Commission on Tuesday.

Dalley has been collecting windmills for 30 years.

“I would like to keep them in the county, because most of them came from the county,” Dalley said.

[...]

Roosevelt County Commissioner Bill Cathey said he likes the idea, and thinks the windmills could be best displayed at the Roosevelt County Fairgrounds, and maybe even downtown on the square.

“I’m going to do all I can to preserve and keep the windmills together,” Cathey said, adding he will work with the fair board, city council and chamber of commerce to try to move the idea along.

I hope Commissioner Cathey is persuasive in his arguments.  I'd hate to see this unique Americana collection broken up and sent off with the four winds (ahem).

And now my post from two years ago...

The Dalley Windmill Collection

 Anyone who’s traveled on the American Great Plains knows that the landscape is dotted with windmills... most of which are still functioning, drawing water for cattle and other livestock. In some parts of the country the standard joke is the windmill is the Unofficial State Tree. That’s probably true here on The High Plains of New Mexico, as trees of any sort are in very short supply. 

One of Portales, New Mexico’s minor claims to fame…and they’re ALL minor, come to think on it… is The Dalley Windmill Collection. From Southeastern New Mexico (The Arts, Museums, and Must-See Sites) (ed: dead link):

The Dalley Windmill Collection
One of the residents of Portales has a collection of 75 windmills from around the world. You can drive by and see all of the beautiful windmills. On a good and windy day they will be turning and charming the eyes of viewers.
Address 1506 Killgore St., Portales, NM
Phone (505) 356-6263

“A good and windy day” would be nearly any day in P-Ville, except for today. I took a ride out to the Dalley’s place earlier this afternoon to take the pictures you see here. I had hoped to talk to Mr. Dalley and get some background on his collection but no one was home…alas and alack. I was able to take pictures, though… and this post contains three such.

This is the first of what may be many windmill photos. I also put up more (and different) photos of Mr. Dalley’s windmills at The Summer Photo Project 2008. And, apropos of nothing… You’ll be able to tell when The Muse goes off to wherever it is she goes from time to time… coz there’ll be more windmill photos.

As always...click for larger.

I posted more windmill photos if'n you're interested, Gentle Reader.  My Muse has a habit of going AWOL, as noted above.

Never Forget

New York

The Pentagon

Shanksville PA

2,977 innocents murdered.  NEVER forget.

As We Speak

Plugged in, charging, and on page four of Robin Olds' "Fighter Pilot," as we speak.  We DID manage to read the "Quick Start" guide before diving in to Gen. Olds' biography.  And we'll take it out on the verandah for Happy Hour once it's fully charged.

Start-up was intuitive, moving around within documents is the same, and the screen is oh-so-easy to read.  The size and weight seem about right, as well.  I'll have more as time moves on but my initial impressions are excellent.  I think I'm gonna love this thing...

Eat Shit and DIE, Onion!

OK... we're through.  This is the LAST time I embed your crappy stuff, Onion.

NHL Star Called Up To Big Leagues To Play For NFL Team

All kidding aside, The Onion makes a good point in a left-handed manner.  The world's fastest and toughest sport just don't get no respect from the Great Unwashed.  OTOH, I kinda like that being the elitist I'm prone to bein'.  On the other, other hand... The Onion could have gone with "Ovechkin to add toughness to Dolphin squad, other pussy NFL teams looking to the NHL for same."  Missed opportunities, and all that.  Just sayin'.

27 days!

It's About Time

From a US Army news release:

WASHINGTON (Sept. 10, 2010) -- Thursday, President Obama spoke with Staff Sgt. Salvatore Giunta to inform him that he will be awarded the Medal of Honor for acts of gallantry at the risk of his life that went above and beyond the call of duty.

Giunta will be the first living servicemember to be awarded the Medal of Honor for service in Iraq or Afghanistan. The President thanked Sergeant Giunta for his service and extraordinary bravery in battle.

Further information about the date and time of the ceremony will be released at a later date.

Congratulations, Sergeant Giunta.  I salute you, sir!

The fact we've been at war for nearly nine whole years and SSG Giunta is the first living recipient of the MoH does not reflect great credit on the United States' senior military leadership, up to and including the president... BOTH wartime presidents.  There are many troops who could have... and should have... been awarded the MoH instead of a Distinguished Service Cross or a Navy Cross.  The award of the Medal of Honor to SSG Giunta is something that has been long overdue, in principal.

I'm not taking anything away from SSG Giunta, far from it.  You can read the reason he's receiving the MoH at the link.

h/t:  Occasional Reader Katy.

Playin' Russian Roulette...

...with our awning.  We have a weather eye (heh) out on the skies, given we have our awning down to ward off the afternoon sun.  It's hot out and we have full sun on our westward side at the moment, thus the awning is deployed to protect us from those rays that will not be denied.  This is what we look like as we type...

Here's our forecast:

Isolated showers and thunderstorms will move east and northeast over the southeast plains and higher terrain of Lincoln County through 300 PM. Brief rain...gusty winds up to 40 mph...pea size hail...and lightning strikes are possible with the stronger activity. The best chance to experience precipitation through 300 PM will extend from near Dunken to Roswell...along Highway 70 from Roswell to Portales... as well as Milnesand...Taiban...and Melrose.

It's that 40 mph wind gust thing we're worried about... as our awning is rated for 25 mph winds at the most.  They are expensive, those awnings, and we'd most certainly hate to lose one to stupidity.  Don't ask us how we know.

Still and even... it's nice out under the awning and we shall continue as we've begun... with a good cigar and similarly good beer.  With eyes peeled.

A selection from today's Happy Hour soundtrack...

Yea... holler for more!  Heh.  In my dreams... and memories.

Well, Now. This Looks Like Big Fun!

Hey!  Let's go on a cruise!  We can play furniture dodge-ball... among other fun things... like turning greener than your run o' the mill cucumber.  I shouldn't mention lunch.

h/t:  The Awl.  My go-to place when all else fails.  Which is where I also found this:



Heh.

News

I read this lil blurb in the AFA's Daily Report this morning...

Low Flyers: The Air Force is considering establishing a low-altitude tactical navigation (LATN) area in northern New Mexico and southern Colorado. The LATN, which is pending an environmental impact assessment, would provide airspace for C-130s and CV-22s to conduct air combat maneuvers and low-altitude tactics training. If approved, the Air Force would fly about two sorties a day, or about 688 sorties a year. The aircraft could fly as low as 200 feet at 250 knots through the mountainous countryside. "The proposed LATN area in Colorado and New Mexico was selected due to the varied topography and weather, proximity to Cannon AFB[, N.M.,] and lack of large civilian populations," according to a Cannon release. The training would enable Cannon's 27th Special Operations Wing to "provide air combat support and would sustain combat-ready crews for worldwide deployment," states the release. Officials also are considering an alternative proposal, which includes a smaller section of airspace.

Some ranchers and oilmen are gonna be treated to their very own up-close-and-personal airshows in the near future.  Dang!  I live in the wrong part of New Mexico...  

(image from The Wiki)

―:☺:―

In other news... from a recent e-mail conversation with SN3:

so whats going on in Portales?

Oh... just the usual.

You may or may not have heard about the tsunami that wiped out the south side of town Friday night.  No one was hurt, though, as everyone (except me) was at the opening game of the high school football season and the stadium is on the north side of town.  The media never showed up to cover the massive property loss and destruction because no one died.  They're like that (the media), yanno?

Saturday an AC-130 from Cannon AFB put seven 105mm cannon rounds into a convoy of milk trucks right outside of Beautiful La Hacienda Trailer Park.  Three trucks were destroyed but once again: no one was hurt.  The clean-up went remarkably quick, as EVERY feral cat in Beautiful La Hacienda Trailer Park was on the scene in minutes... and they lapped up all the milk.  But there are all those new pot-holes from the cannon rounds that need to be fixed, but we can drive around those.  There's an investigation pending; early info sez the crew had a flashback and thought the milk trucks were full of Taliban.  Me?  I'm worried about all those overly fat kitties.  They can hardly walk now... they kinda waddle instead.

I was kidnapped and held for ransom Sunday evening by a gaggle of scantily-clad co-eds from Eastern NM U.  But I convinced them to let me go with a promise of all the free beer they could drink.  They took me home, wiped out the beer supply in my fridge, and then staggered back to their trailers.  That was a close call.

Yesterday I made a beer run and re-supplied all the beer those crazy co-eds drank up.  And I cleaned up the mess on the verandah.  Those girls just couldn't hold their beer, yanno?  I think they need more practice and we've arranged for a re-match/advanced drinking lesson (it's a 500-level course) this coming weekend.  A couple of 'em are actually pretty friendly for kidnappers.

Aside from that... nothing much.  What's going on in Fort Collins?

I obviously don't share everything that happens around here with you, Gentle Reader.  But you're updated now.

We Are Excited!

Just received this...

Greetings from Amazon.com.

We thought you'd like to know that we shipped your items, and that this
completes your order.  Your order is being shipped and cannot be changed
by you or by our customer service department.

Followed by this...

Dear Norman E Pennington,

Congratulations on your purchase and welcome to Amazon Kindle.

We built Kindle with the goal of creating an exceptional and hassle-free reading experience. As such, we wanted to point out a few details before you get started.

Your Kindle is automatically registered to the same Amazon.com account you used to make your purchase. This enables you to shop, purchase, and download books, newspapers and magazines wirelessly from your Kindle right out of the box.

[...]

You can start building your library before your Kindle even arrives by shopping for books, newspapers, magazines and more at the Kindle Store on Amazon.com. Amazon's unique wireless delivery system, Amazon Whispernet, will auto-deliver your purchases directly to your Kindle. Once you receive your Kindle, you can also shop the same great selection directly from your device. 

Oh, wow.  The anticipation is building... and we are in need of GREAT restraint at this very moment.  Because we could go freakin' wild in the Kindle store.  God save us.

Screech Engrish, Prease!

I've been overwhelmed with spam since turning word verification off, but that's OK.  Blogger's newish automated spam filter (new to me, as of three days ago) is pretty good at catching that shit and the fact I moderate comments now (reminder: against my will) means even those onsies and twosies that get by the spam filter don't see the light of your day, Gentle Reader.

That said... this lil bit of Engrish I found in the spam trap made me smile...

You already skilled in that a multitude is someone that facilitates an incident, or a raison d'etre, like the horde at a party, or an emcee on the tranny or TV.  In our in the event that, a pack involves a computer that is setup to direction the networking and communications necessary to make allowance a Cobweb Situation to flaunt custom formatted documents on the Dialect birth deliver Extensive Web.

Typically, these documents are formatted using a idiosyncratic vernacular called HTML (Hypertext Markup Jargon) that supports mouse click connections to other almost identical documents on the Area Encyclopedic Web.  These HTML documents are normally called Network Pages, and you are looking at one such page these days in your browser window. To detain track of these Web pages in an organized manner, individual and typical of areas are set-aside benefit of them called Trap Sites.

A website may hold one web page or thousands. Websites are stored on computers that are connected to the Internet and setup to communicate their contents to the lie-down of the Internet.  The people and companies that control these special computers are called Web Hosts.  The computers that manage the Web Hosting chores are called Servers, and they may serve any host of Web sites, unified or even hundreds. A spider web emcee ensures that the Web Servers that restrict the Web Sites are functioning duly all of the time.  That may incorporate adding a patron's Web sites to the Servers, pathetic Net sites from ditty Server to another, deleting dusty Spider's web Sites, monitoring the amount of Internet traffic and labour enchanting niche and a multitude of other tasks required to ensure tranquil operation.  Web hosting companies come in diverse shapes and sizes, and assorted specialize in certain types of Hosting.

That also took the cake for longest spam comment I've ever seen, left-wing trolls excepted.  Here's the whole thing:

Heh.

We're Numbah One... Again

Heh.  Via a SiteMeter hit from USMC.mil.

I Loves Me Some (i)Google

My new Google home page theme:

I had "Tea House" for ages as a nod to my experiences in Nippon... but made the change in anticipation of the upcoming season.  Only 31 days to go!

Today's Happy Hour Soundtrack

Forgive me, Gentle Reader, this moment of self-indulgence.  We're listening to "Blood on the Tracks" this afternoon, indulging our inner masochist.  While this was never my favorite song on the album... it really fits today.

People see me all the time and they just can’t remember how to act
Their minds are filled with big ideas, images and distorted facts
Even you, yesterday you had to ask me where it was at
I couldn’t believe after all these years, you didn’t know me better than that
Sweet lady

Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your mouth
Blowing down the backroads headin’ south
Idiot wind, blowing every time you move your teeth
You’re an idiot, babe
It’s a wonder that you still know how to breathe

Full lyrics here, but the video posted above has additional lyrics not included in the original "Blood On the Tracks" version.  Life sometimes imitates art and life is sometimes eerie beyond belief.  Who'd a thunk it?

Labor Day and an Admin Note

First the admin note, which is a classic case of good news/bad news.  The good:  I've turned word verification off.  The bad:  I've turned comment moderation on.  I hate comment moderation but I have no choice in this matter because of a case of mud-slinging and disrespect last evening.  This person keeps strange hours and I do not want to read her snarky comments first thing in the morning... so: moderation.  Please accept my apologies for the inconvenience.  I'll work to approve comments as expeditiously as possible.

And now the Labor Day re-runs.  Plural.  One is from last year and the other is a couple o' tunes from the ultimate working-class rock'n'roll band.  I couldn't choose which one to post for the holiday, so ya get both.

Labor Day

Today is the day we celebrate "Labor Day" which, in times past, was a true celebration of American Labor.  And by that I mean the people who manipulate the "means of production"… the guys and gals who go out and get their hands dirty making this country work, day in and day out.  But "Labor" as both term and concept has become perverted over the past few years.  Actually… Labor has become politicized and has only a shadow of the meaning it used to carry, back in the day.  Who among us doesn't think of unions when one says or hears the word "Labor" today?  Not many of us, I would wager.

I will resist the temptation to turn this post into an anti-union screed, and said temptation is strong indeed, Gentle Reader.  But let me just say this about that… I'm of the opinion that labor unions are the root of all most evil in our post-industrial society.  I'll grant you labor unions have a glorious history and were responsible for righting numerous wrongs in the early 20^th century (you can begin reading here if you're not up on the good unions accomplished during that time).  But like the buggy whip, their time has passed.  What we get from our unions today are things like "card check" —a decidedly UN-American renunciation of free elections in the workplace— and outright political intimidation (can you spell S-E-I-U?  Sure you can…).  I'm not seeing much good in that… and neither are most other Americans, as Ed Morrissey notes in this Hot Air post.  But let us not digress further; I'm sure you get my point.

I'm thinking an appropriate manner in which to observe Labor Day would be to spend a few hours watching re-runs of Mike Rowe's "Dirty Jobs."  About which... the Discovery Channel is running an all-day marathon of "Dirty Jobs" episodes... or you could watch the DVDs.  If you don't have access to either the Discovery Channel or the "Dirty Jobs" DVDs, you might want to watch his (Rowe's) 20-minute lecture on"Dirty Jobs" at TED.com.  Mr. Rowe celebrates "labor" as it used to be… manual labor as an honorable pursuit infused with dignity.  As it should be.  And that's what I'm on about here, Gentle Reader. 

Or perhaps today might be spent reading a book like "Shopcraft as Soulcraft."  The NYT published a review of this book earlier this year, which starts out pretty well but descends rapidly into a typical NYT snarky book review (on subjects of this nature, of course.  Not all of their book reviews are worthless, just some.  Or most… depending on your POV.).  Here's the best part of the review:

It’s especially appealing when you add that Mr. Crawford has a Ph.D. in political philosophy from the University of Chicago and was a postdoctoral fellow — he had an office next to the novelist J. M. Coetzee’s — on the school’s Committee on Social Thought. Mr. Crawford is an intellectual who can probably take you in a bar fight.

Many of the ideas in “Shop Class as Soulcraft” are deeply resonant. Mr. Crawford mourns that shop classes were largely eliminated from American high schools in the 1990s because they are expensive to run, and sometimes dangerous. He takes this as a symptom of a larger problem: We have, as a people, lost our fundamental manual competence. We can no longer fix our own stuff, and we are increasingly steering our kids “toward the most ghostly kinds of work.”

His book, he writes, “advances a nestled set of arguments on behalf of work that is meaningful because it is genuinely useful. It also explores what we might call the ethics of maintenance and repair.”

Mr. Crawford builds his framework by walking us through the soul-killing nature of too much white-collar work; he surveys the “rising sea of clerkdom” that surrounds us. He considers the work of Marx, Heidegger and Iris Murdoch, among other philosophers. He points out, accurately enough, that “when things get really hairy, you want an experienced human being in control.” He connects the current mortgage crisis to the depersonalization of white-collar work.

This is not “Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance” Part 2. Mr. Crawford isn’t particularly interested in the nonrational mind. “I want to avoid the kind of mysticism that gets attached to ‘craftsmanship,’ ” he writes, “while doing justice to the very real satisfactions it offers.”

You would be forgiven, Gentle Reader, if you didn't chase the link and read the rest of the piece which is in the end dismissive at best, or borders on character assassination, at worst.  I'd rather you spent that time watching the little piece below (from last Friday's "News Hour with Jim Lehrer"), where Mr. Crawford speaks his mind on what we're on about here.  It's great good stuff.



Seven minutes ain't that much time to waste, is it?

And… Happy Labor Day… Drink beer, barbeque, and have a great time!

Ladies and Gentlemen... The Rolling Stones!

“Let’s Drink to the Hard-Working People…”

You don’t think of the Rolling Stones…at least I don’t… when it comes to delivering socially-conscious messages in song. But I can’t, for the life of me, think of a more appropriate tune for Labor Day. So, it’s in that spirit that I give you “Salt of the Earth.” (lyrics here)

It’s interesting to note that Jagger dismissed this song as one written in “total cynicism.” While that may be true, I prefer to derive my own meaning from the lyrics… and in MY interpretation, those “hard working people” are indeed the “Salt of the Earth.” Screw a bunch of cynics.

On the other hand… I could have posted this tune (Hell, I’m gonna post it anyway), which is kinda-sorta appropriate for Labor Day, innit? Both of these songs are from “Beggars Banquet,” which… apropos of nothing… just might be The Stones’ best album.

Factory girls: God Love ‘Em!

Enjoy your Labor Day, Gentle Reader.

Today's Happy Hour Soundtrack

Pandora kicked this out during today's Happy Hour... to wit:

Since I'm feelin' rather charitable today... as opposed to mean-spirited... we'll post the tune.

Here's a Not-So-Secret message to a former spouse, all others should disregard.  I strongly suspect you have blocked my e-mails based on our recent, regrettable, and acrimonious e-mail exchange.  This is NOT a good ideer coz there will be times when I need to contact you concerning our son, to wit... Tri-Care issues, schooling, and the like.  I base this assumption on the fact you didn't have the courtesy to acknowledge my replies to YOUR recent e-mails or answer my questions concerning same.  I wouldn't go public with this if I thought you were reading my e-mail... see "acknowledgment," above... but I know you read the blog.  Have no fear... I will play by your rules and will only contact you when absolutely necessary.  But have some common courtesy at the very least when YOU choose to contact ME.  End o' message.

Pretty Cool

This is what my in-box looked like this morning when I fired up the 'puter:

Google's update fairies came by late last night and blessed me with g-mail's new "prioritized" in-box.  Since Google does the 'splainin' better than I could...

I don't get a lot of e-mail these days... not compared to the three or four hundred e-mails I got every frickin'  day when I was working... and I sure could have used a "priority" in-box back then.  Well, I did have a priority system, of sorts.  It was called the "delete" key and approximately half of my daily e-mail traffic was deleted, unread.  I could go off on a rant here about e-mail, stupid e-mail users, and corporate spam but I won't.  Anyone and everyone in the working world knows what I'm on about.

The only thing I don't like about g-mail's priority system is it puts your starred mail in your in-box.  I've been using the star feature for years... I use it to flag certain messages I don't want to have to search for, which is different than g-mail's "I'll get back to this later" ideer.  But: no biggie.  You can minimize the starred portion of your in-box, and I've done just that.  All in all?  I like it.  I like g-mail a lot, too... mainly coz it has the BEST spam filter, evah.

And now to read today's mail.

Today's Happy Hour Soundtrack

We delayed Happy Hour until after today's game and are pleased to report we drank celebratory beers rather than those wherein we drown our sorrows.  The Irish are off to a good start this year.  Not a great start, but a good one.  A "W" beats an "L" on any given Saturday, of course.  It remains to be seen how ND will stack up against a ranked team... but they didn't look all that bad in the home opener.  Cierre Wood was particularly impressive... that dude can run the ball.  All in all, not a bad first game for Coach Kelly.  May I have another, Sir?

Apropos of college ball... the ONLY football, I should add... leave us not forget my usual, customary, and reasonable football post, since this is the first Saturday of the season.  Without further ado...

The Rules

I missed this today before I posted, but it would have fit right in with the lead two items in this morning’s post: “Time for the new rules for college football fandom.” Samples:

1. As a fan, you have to pick a school, one school, same as if you were filling out applications to, you know, go to school there. You may not be a fan of a conference, teams from a specific state, "West Coast football" or college football in general. Nobody is a fan of college football in general, not even Lee Corso. Nor may you root for Harvard and Yale, any more than you could matriculate at both places, unless you're really, really smart, in which case you're probably building prototype military surveillance nanobots in your MIT dorm room, and/or devising a computerized ranking system* to shame Jeff Sagarin.

1a. Under extenuating circumstances, however, you may have up to three Division I-A rooting allegiances, so long as the schools meet the following criteria:

(a) Your birthplace/family school – especially if an inheritance is at stake, or if a campus library bears your last name.
(b) Al(most)ma mater – the school you transferred from.
(c) The school that actually handed you a diploma. Or would have, if you hadn't finished three credits short.
(d) Your spouse's school, especially if the program is vastly superior to your own, or your spouse cares waaaay more than you do, in which case: good call on getting married!
(e) You're a bandwagon-jumping, low-self-esteem weenie and scurry from Notre Dame to Miami to Ohio State to USC to Boise State depending on the year, the polls and the amount of water flooding into the ship.

If you can't be true to a school, at least be true to your own weaselly nature.

[…]

4. If you attended a lower-division or NAIA school, you're allowed to pick a D-I school of your choice. But you must consistently root for that school year in and year out, and it's preferred that the school be geographically close to you.

4a. Or you can just root for Appalachian State every week.

4b. Notre Dame? How very original.

[…]

9. You are allowed to root freely against the following schools for no specific reasons: Notre Dame; Notre Dame in their puke-green jerseys; Notre Dame when playing on "Triumph of the Will"-shaming propaganda house organ NBC; USC; any school that plays its fight song approximately 4,387 times per game like USC; Michigan; Miami; Ohio State; any school like Ohio State with a pretentious "the" in front of its name, because otherwise how would we know which Ohio State university they were talking about?; any school coached by Steve Spurrier; any school coached by Nick Saban. (ed: I’d add “any team from Florida” to this list, but that’s a minor quibble.)

You may have noticed that I’m in the 4b fan category. Given that I never went to college, I’m free to root for the school of my choice, under rules Four and 1a (d) above, even if that means I root for my former spouse’s school (The Second Mrs. Pennington is a Notre Dame alumna). And I have been an ND fan for nearly 30 years now and don’t foresee any change in that status on the near or far horizons. It’s way too late to change allegiances at this point in life. While we’re at it, I should mention I’m a fan of, and root for, at least three schools, depending on who’s playing whom: ND, Michigan (the ten year living-in-Detroit connection), and Air Force. For reasons that should be obvious now. The only time I’m torn is when ND plays Air Force…and I well and truly don’t know what to do during that game. Very traumatic, that.

So, to the author of “The Rules,” especially Rule 4b: Put a sock in it. I like ‘em, otherwise.

Now you know why I'm an ND fan.

Don't Tease Me, Bro!

That would be my friends at Amazon.  I was oh-so-excited to see this in my in-box a short time ago...

Hello from Amazon.com.

We now have delivery date(s) for the order you placed on August 17 2010 (Order# ):

  "Kindle Wireless Reading Device, Free 3G + Wi-Fi, 6" Display, Graphite, 3G Works Globally - Latest Generation"

Estimated arrival date: September 10 2010

For more details, please visit the "Your Account" section of our web site...

Yow!  Yes... let's go see!  So I did and find this:

Teasers.  Gawd, I HATE teasers.