The End o' the World as We Know It

No, not REM... this, as sent by an Occasional Correspondent:

The End Of The World As We Know It:

When the end of the world arrives, how will the media report it?

USA Today: WE'RE DEAD

The Wall Street Journal: DOW JONES PLUMMETS AS WORLD ENDS

National Enquirer: SHEEP MISSING ALL OVER WORLD

Microsoft Systems Journal: APPLE LOSES MARKET SHARE

Sports Illustrated: GAME OVER

Wired: THE LAST NEW THING

Rolling Stone: THE GRATEFUL DEAD REUNION TOUR

Readers Digest: BYE

Discover Magazine: HOW WILL THE EXTINCTION OF ALL LIFE AS WE KNOW IT AFFECT THE WAY WE VIEW THE COSMOS?

TV Guide: DEATH AND DAMNATION: NIELSON RATINGS SOAR!

Lady's Home Journal: LOSE 10 LBS. BY JUDGMENT DAY WITH OUR NEW "ARMAGEDDON" DIET!

America Online: SYSTEM TEMPORARILY DOWN. TRY CALLING BACK IN 100 YEARS

Inc. magazine: TEN WAYS YOU CAN PROFIT FROM THE APOCALYPSE

 Microsoft's Web Site: IF YOU DIDN'T EXPERIENCE THE RAPTURE, DOWNLOAD SOFTWARE PATCH RAPT777.EXE.

IBM: ARMAGEDDON TOLERANT SOFTWARE NOW AVAILABLE!

The New York Times: Proof that Bush policies caused global warming

 Boston Globe: STRONG N.E. WINDS PREDICTED

Cuba Libre: AMERICA BLOWS UP WORLD

Arizona Republic: Temperatures expected to hit 1016 F today.

Heh.  Apropos o' not much... I watched "2012" the other night and it looks like we're in for one hella year next year.  Or not.